In recovery rooms there's a little closing chant everyone does: 'It works if you work it so work it you're worth it.' This phrase looped in my mind as I did my morning pages today.
I've not done them every morning; getting back into work and deadlines stuff has been a bit of an adjustment from holiday lolling about but I think I am using them more effectively this time.
You see, the last time I did the AW (and every time after), I used the morning pages to just word vomit everything that was in my head about the day, about my boyfriend, about my anxiety, whatever. This time, I'm purging all of that sort of stuff yes, but I'm also focusing on really diving into the chapter's focus points and discovering what they mean to me.
Last week it was 'creative self-worth' and 'safety'. And this week's dive into identity was about skepticism and identity – who am I as a creator and how was that identity shaped. It hasn't been a pretty trip down memory lane, but I have come to terms with how my identity of 'exile' was shaped and the question is, 'Now what?'
Anyway. I think I've done the work I came here to do and I'm okay now and done with the programme ...
sigh
I've still got another week on Chapter 2 (gave myself two weeks per chapter), maybe this coming week I can try squeeze in an artist's date or something. I have a sticker book for five year olds with my name on it.
I wonder how you're doing and what your struggle is?
I also found myself proudly saying: Sorted... Tick... Tick... through the first few AW2 obstacles (and, yes, with so much living and learning behind that too - yay 40s!) For me the road gets bumpy at Attention.
I have such an inclination to zone out. I am very grateful for my AW1 affirmation ("I am deliberate and discerning with my attention") and I say it a lot. The past two weeks have had a lot going on including distractions in the early morning and going back to work which made the chunk of me-time I need for this difficult to stick to. I’m glad we’re stretching this over 2 weeks.
I did however have a powerful dream about my creativity and used the morning pages to work through it. There is obviously stuff brewing there…
In recovery rooms there's a little closing chant everyone does: 'It works if you work it so work it you're worth it.' This phrase looped in my mind as I did my morning pages today.
I've not done them every morning; getting back into work and deadlines stuff has been a bit of an adjustment from holiday lolling about but I think I am using them more effectively this time.
You see, the last time I did the AW (and every time after), I used the morning pages to just word vomit everything that was in my head about the day, about my boyfriend, about my anxiety, whatever. This time, I'm purging all of that sort of stuff yes, but I'm also focusing on really diving into the chapter's focus points and discovering what they mean to me.
Last week it was 'creative self-worth' and 'safety'. And this week's dive into identity was about skepticism and identity – who am I as a creator and how was that identity shaped. It hasn't been a pretty trip down memory lane, but I have come to terms with how my identity of 'exile' was shaped and the question is, 'Now what?'
Anyway. I think I've done the work I came here to do and I'm okay now and done with the programme ...
sigh
I've still got another week on Chapter 2 (gave myself two weeks per chapter), maybe this coming week I can try squeeze in an artist's date or something. I have a sticker book for five year olds with my name on it.
I wonder how you're doing and what your struggle is?
t
x
Ah Pietro, dreamy Pietro :-) ...
And thank you for the "work it" chant reminder.
I also found myself proudly saying: Sorted... Tick... Tick... through the first few AW2 obstacles (and, yes, with so much living and learning behind that too - yay 40s!) For me the road gets bumpy at Attention.
I have such an inclination to zone out. I am very grateful for my AW1 affirmation ("I am deliberate and discerning with my attention") and I say it a lot. The past two weeks have had a lot going on including distractions in the early morning and going back to work which made the chunk of me-time I need for this difficult to stick to. I’m glad we’re stretching this over 2 weeks.
I did however have a powerful dream about my creativity and used the morning pages to work through it. There is obviously stuff brewing there…
I love that about journaling and the morning pages – the opportunity to go deeper.
Ah Pietro, dream Pietro ... I fell in love with him a bit
me too!